This week marks the first week of Holiday Shopping! It opened with Black Friday and Cyber Monday. People have come to plan for these days and companies have come to exploit or extend these days. There is a craze or frenzy that surrounds these days of shopping. Yet, we hear people talk about the behavior of the people who go into these sale days with great intensity and, at times, aggression to find the items they wish to purchase at the great prices advertised!! It seems that most people agree that this “beginning of the season” does not match the “meaning of the season”.
So, why do you succumb to the seduction of the commercializing of the season?
You may find yourself “buying” into the need to purchase gifts (and many of them) because of a need to be seen as good enough, because it is expected by the other or by society, or because of the fear of judgment or disappointment if you do not. If you begin to understand your reactionary buying in response to the seductive advertisements and promises then you will begin to open and, consequently, see more intimate and creative gifts of love and acceptance. Our intrinsic focus allows for an intimate gift rather than an extrinsic focus that allows for a number of gifts.
In 2013, I talked about the gift of the holiday in the absence of money and how difficult that is when you are surrounded by media and society that say, “Buy buy buy!” You can forget how much of a gift each of you is. In 2014, I talked about the gift of You! You are the light in each person’s life for whom you will be purchasing a gift. So, how do you give your Self as the gift? Both articles address the idea that people are losing their Selves in this sales-driven gifting in this season.
How might you open this season with gifts that aren’t part of the greed of business? What if each community, family, or person decided to make at least one gift? What if each person decided to buy at least one gift from a local business or artist or crafts person? Now, in this time of love, acceptance and new beginning, you are gifting AND honoring your Self and your family as part of the gift. By buying locally and from private individuals, you are honoring your community.
What meaning do you give to gifts at this time of year? Are they things and objects purchased to make you good enough in the eyes of the receiver? Is it something you “have” to do? Purchased gifts usually are exciting at the time they are received and for that period of time that they are useful. Intrinsic gifts last forever.
This year stop in the middle of all your purchasing and list making. Ask your Self what the one thing is you most love about the person for whom you are purchasing. Then ask what the one thing is that most lights up the relationship with that person. Now you have 2 important components for the gift. It may not be a gift you can purchase but it is a gift that the other will cherish forever if it reflects this meaning. Every other gift given will be temporary in comparison.
I wish you all a season of love and acceptance that is far beyond the purchase.
