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Social Media and the Facade We Create

March 2, 2015

Are you on social media? Facebook? What does your page say about you? What does it not say about you?
People tend to feed their fears with their presentations online. Some may only show the good “stuff”. Others may show the fear driven attitudes, happenings, thoughts, and opinions. Either way they are not fostering their freedom and happiness in this life.

 

It amazes me the number of people who can create an image on Facebook that is in almost complete contrast or opposition to what they’re experiencing inside their own self and in their life. Many people tend to want to create an image of who they wish to be and how they wish to be seen. They feel this is necessary in contrast to what they really are experiencing because what they are experiencing or perceiving about themselves on the inside is something they judge to not be good enough, attractive, acceptable, etc. I am not suggesting people begin airing their dirty laundry. Going to that extreme would be creating an image that attracts attention as well – negative attention, but attention just the same.

 

Images created are artificial. The people who create the perfect image are creating the world and experiences in which they wish to live and the image of how they wish to be perceived by others. The irony is that if they can create this image with their thoughts and their images then they are able to be and have that life. It is the fear that developed from others’ judgments, actions, and opinions that lead to the disbelief and shame in self. It is that fear that blocks them from going after the truth in their life and finding great happiness as that which they want others to perceive. The very act of presenting a falsely perfect world feeds their fear that they cannot have that. It also feeds the fears that others would not like them if they knew the truth or that they would not be “good enough” if their world did not appear so perfect.

 

Others may create an image through constant presentation of tragedy, accidents, worry and upset. This presentation is also artificial. These are the pages that have a lot of judgment of others and a lot of competitive, or us-against-them, messages. The people who present this way are hoping for people to join in with them so they can feel right. They may also be looking for others to offer suggestions of hope and happiness, or for others to understand and empathize with them, or for others to show caring and concern. No matter what they are hoping, it all goes back to a feeling of not being good enough and looking for others to confirm they are good enough by being right and good against the backdrop of destruction. It may be a need to inform and warn as if that is protecting or helping. People who do this may be afraid their world could be destroyed at any time. They may believe they must worry.

 

Consequently, they may be living the fear through the storylines presented online. Because the fear is being perpetuated in the hopes of being understood, warning, or taken care of, the person is never seen or known and, so, is not feeling the attending necessary to heal. Thereby perpetuating the fear and not the healing of it.

 

Obviously there are many other styles of presenting a false image online. It matters not what the image is. It matters that each person is willing (or finds the willingness) to see that it is an image and ask their Self why they are creating it.

 

So, what am I suggesting you post??? Your truth in some version. Look at your page, does it have some of everything or is it lopsided in some way? What does that tell you about you? We all have the same emotions. It is a universal language. So, everyone “notices” when things are too good or too not. So, I would say relax with the posts. Show your colors. Show the good, the grand and the great but also show the disappointments. You can show the down side through stories or quotes. You do not have to tell the world what is happening personally as long as you express the other feelings that exist inside. It does not have to go from spectacular to disastrous. Gossip does not have to exist. It does not have to go from doom and gloom to sunny and bright. It can be doomy and gloomy with an understanding of why. Then it can be tweaked with some positive quotes or pictures of what you would like to see occur if doom and gloom went away! Post your gratitude even if you feel there are few.

 

Feel the difference when you look at your pages when they have a greater balance of you. You may begin to feel a greater acceptance of you in ALL of your colors!! May you all enjoy your online socializing and may you find it can be a place of truth and joy.

 

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Kristen Bomas, PA
398 Camino Gardens Blvd., Suite 104
Boca Raton, Fl 33432

561.212.7575
KB@KristenBomas.com

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